Monday, December 28, 2009

home, sweet home

(our beautiful christmas tree)

things i love about being home:

-flannel sheets and pj's
-sheepskin slippers
-a glass of wine (or two) with dinner every night

-my mama's cooking
-fresh bread à la papa hariasz
-the rubber ducky in my shower
-driving around in the little old honda
-coffee dates with amazing people
-snuggling with my kitty
-sky and trees and open spaces
-not paying for anything

-time to read
-my papasan chair
-sleeping in (relatively speaking)
-the fireplace of course

et, la belle chose du jour:
Ohio is a snow globe today. Snowflakes were swirling madly all day, piling up one on top of the other and blanketing the bushes in front of my house. When the Christmas lights turned on, their heat and energy melted away little craters in the snowcaps-- there is a golden glow emanating from the bushes and it is beautiful. Kind of like this...

Friday, December 25, 2009

to be human


(from weheartit.com)

"A human being is a synthesis
of the infinite and the finite,
of the temporal and the eternal,
of freedom and necessity."
-Kierkegaard

Sunday, December 13, 2009

can you keep a secret?


(found on weheartit.com)

I'm writing a paper about secrets...
...so I thought I'd share some of mine.

-I beatbox in the shower.
-I screen calls and I have no idea why.
-Firefighters turn me on.
-I don't wear my retainer every night (sorry mom).
-I have a crippling fear of being less than perfect.
-My favorite thing to do when I'm home alone is dance around in my underwear, making up choreography to songs from musicals.
-When I was little I shut the door on my cat's tail and the tip fell off.
-Sometimes I think about 'auditioning' for a reality show.
-Sometimes I wish I wasn't so responsible.
-'The Luckiest' by Ben Folds makes me cry every time.
-I am petrified of Hasidic Jews.
-I have really bad road rage.
-I am incredibly judgmental.
-Caffeine makes me gassy.
-I haven't actually started this paper on secrets quite yet.

-I can't stop thinking about someone that I definitely should not be thinking about.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

conscious spontaneity


(found on weheartit.com)

"The Situationists pronounced a commitment to living 'a life of permanent novelty.' They were interested only in freedom and just about any means to it were justified. The creativity of everyday people, which consumer capitalism and communism had weakened but not killed, desperately needed expressing...To the Situationists, you are--everyone is--a creator of situations, a performance artist, and the performance, of course, is your life, lived in your own way."

Freedom. Tastes foreign on my tongue. Why live your life according to the standards set by others? You were blessed with a beautiful body and a capable brain, and have hopefully been surrounded by smart, inspiring people (both living and in books) and have learned enough about life thus far in order to beat your own path and beat it well.

"Debord developed some effective ways to break out of the mass-culture trance. One way was the dérive. Literally 'the drift,' the dérive was an idea borrowed from the Dadaists. The Situationists defined it is 'locomotion without a goal.' As a dériviste, you float through the city, open to whatever you come in contact with, thus exposing yourself to the whole spectrum of feelings you encounter by chance in everyday life. Openness is key. You embrace whatever you love, and in the process, you discover what it is you hate."

As Adele sings, "I ain't lost, just wandering."
Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid.

"The Situationists saw a world crushed by wasted potential. Mass mechanization, for example, was supposed to create vast stretches of leisure time in which people could create free flowing, imaginative lives for themselves. Instead people were allowing their leisure hours to be gobbled up by programmed entertainments...The Situationist solution: Take back the show. Create your own atmospheres, ambiances, and situations. Build something 'provisional and lived.'"

If only the Situationists could see us now, our leisure hours defined by programmed entertainments. Our every waking moments spent in front of glowing rectangles. Mindless entertainment in order to unwind, we say. What if your life was so fulfilling you didn't need to unwind? And why would you want something mindless, anyway? Live and learn.

"Maybe only when you're shoved into a new pattern of behavior and make the commitment not to back out--when your hand is held to the fire or you hold your own hand to the fire--do the real gains come. When the trance is interrupted, you catch a brief, tantalizing glimpse of the way life could be...Stopping the flow relies on an element of surprise. Debord called this kind of thing 'breaking the old syntax,' and replacing it with a new one. The new syntax carries the instructions for 'a whole new way of being in the world.'"

Don't be afraid. Don't be afraid.

"The American dream has devolved into exactly the kind of vacant obliviousness they talked about--a have-a-nice-day kind of happiness that close examination tends to disturb. If you keep up appearances, keep yourself diverted with new acquisitions and constant entertainments, keep yourself pharmacologized and recoil the moment you feel real life seeping in between the cracks, you'll be all right. Some dream."

That phrase: have-a-nice-day kind of happiness. It has become so impersonal, a nicety uttered without eye contact. It's become part of the routine. It's like the security guard in your building, or your favorite barista at the coffee shop: these are people you are dealing with. Real, live, breathing, thinking human beings. But do you even know their name? Vacant obliviousness. Prozac nation. Ingesting chemicals to keep the real world, with all its nuances and emotions and twists and turns, away. Why divert yourself from the utmost experience we have, life itself? Because we are all afraid. I am afraid. Don't be afraid.

"The new American dream is simply to approach life full-on, without undue fear or crippling self-censorship, pursuing joy and novelty as if tomorrow you'll be in the ground...There's no other way to discover what's at your core. This is what the new American dream is all about, and this is the kind of person the culture jammer aspires to be: someone who, to paraphrase Ray Bradbury, 'jumps off cliffs and builds his wings on the way down.'"
--quotes from "Culture Jamming," by Kalle Lasn, 1999.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

winter wonderland


(from noodlepip's deviantart)

I think that, from now on, whenever I'm sad, I'm just going to go to an outdoor skating rink and watch people on the ice. I stood downtown on Friday night, watching two of my best friends skate while Christmas music blared out of the speakers behind me, and I could not keep the smile off my face. Awkward young couples holding hands, little children wobbling around the rink and holding on to the railing, graceful skaters with rosy cheeks and the wind in their hair.

So then I buckled up my skates and whizzed onto the ice myself. So happy and free.

I spent a good part of the past few days outside, and loved every minute. There is something about the wind that is so invigorating. There is something about the night sky that that just makes me dream. There is something about the sunshine that makes me instantly happier. I love crunching through leaves and fallen branches in search of a secret stairway leading down to the river.

This weekend was exactly what I needed.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

merci


(starmanmike on flickr)

This year, I am thankful for:

[mama and papa hariasz]
'Nuff said, really, but I'll say some more anyway. They are my two favorite people on this planet. So smart, so humble, and always here for me, pushing me to be the best and believing in me every step of the way, even when I stop believing in myself. They are my rocks. I feel so blessed to have such intelligent, open-minded, loving parents. I mean, I always knew they were, but I think that growing into an adult has made me appreciate them from an even deeper perspective.

[my akron friends]
Crazy, really, how we can move to opposite sides of the country and see each other, on average, about two weeks (if not less!) a year, but still maintain this effortless bond. This lovely bond. My core group: my best friends. I look up to them all so much. We are so lucky.

[my new york friends]
This year has been strange, friends-wise. I was very used to having one group of friends and doing everything together; seeing the same people all the time. Now that I no longer have that, it's been really wonderful getting to know a lot of people better, and not being attached to a drama-ridden group. The world is full of beautiful, inspiring, intelligent people, and I am proud to call a lot of them my friends.

[and, in no particular order]
sunshine...red wine...the night sky...bonfires...intellectual conversations...good books...driving around aimlessly...public transportation...airplanes...student discounts...lunch specials and speedy deliverymen...two dozen roses for ten dollars...yogurt...fruit...fresh bread...cute shoes...warm socks...bear hugs...amazon's free song of the day...inspiring professors...photography and creativity and art in general...paychecks...outdoor concerts...home...pandora...clean sheets...towels out of the dryer...planet earth the show...planet earth the actual planet...and people who care enough to make a difference.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

pixels


(from motleyphotos.blogspot.com via weheartit)

Pretty sure that all the readings for both my Photography and the Visual Archive class, as well as my Advertising and Society class, are making my brain explode. Thanks to all of these theories that are deconstructing the world as I know it, I no longer know how to take it all in. "It" being daily life.

Some gems I find particularly mind-blowing:

In a world where images now supercede reality, we have entered the realm of the hyperreal (thanks Baudrillard). It's difficult to tell what, exactly, reality is, now. The majority of things around us are reproductions, are fakes. We are constantly striving for authenticity, to make up for the loss of the aura.

Is there such a thing as an authentic commodity nowadays? Sure, you can develop a personal relationship with a material good, but does that make it "authentic"? Feelings are still real (I think....) so maybe some authenticity remains... But it's a secondhand reality.


Starting with the mirror stage (in Lacan's view), we recognize ourselves and begin constructing our identities based on an image. An image that is actually just reflected light. And once we realize we can manipulate our image to become something that is not our natural state, to get something we want, etc., we lose sight of our true selves.

Searching for some freedom
So intend to sing them
Songs to spark, memories
What is a man with no history?
Where am i ?
Who am i ?
What is this place?
We're just spinning in space
I will be light
-Matisyahu, I Will Be Light